'Accept this sacrifice, o Great Lord of Darkness'

That's just one of the things you don't want to hear in an OR.

To be honest, going to a hospital should be a trembling-inducing, fearful, nightmarish experience. Basically you're handing your life over to a random stranger and saying "here, take my life and my happiness, even though I don't know that you have an anti-social personality disorder plus a history of three divorces and is on three different anti-depressants." Even after that you have no clue what the heck the doctor is doing, and for all you know he might be sending you to an OR pretending that it's some bizarre, crazy disease while you just might be having a migraine. Bad luck for you.

After scaring the bejesus out of you like that (because, you know, I will be joining the anti-social, thrice-divorced, depressed population called MD's), I would like to finish off with this list:

TOP TEN THINGS YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR IN THE OR:
1 Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

2 Nurse, did this patient sign the organs donation card?

3 Damn! Page 84 of the manual is missing!

4 Everybody stand back! I lost a contact lens!

5 Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie

6 Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

7 "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"

8 Whoa, wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

9 "Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, he's got two of'em

10 What do you mean "You want a divorce?"

Childhood Dreams

I think I had a lot more dreams when I was small. Not just me, but in general children have more hopes and more dreams and everything seemed possible. sadly, as the child grows older each dream pops like a bubble, until the child finds him/herself doing things that he/she doesn't want to do, seeing things he/she doesn't want to see. Nothing that the child wants to do or want. I wonder how such people live.

In my case, I think I was pretty focused. I decided I wanted to become a physician when I was three, and I kept running at it. When I think about it, everything I did, from reading to listening to talking were all focused on becoming a physician. I don't think I was suited to a life as a physician when I was small. Slow, vague, undecisive. Not clever and not ready. Since a physician is required decisiveness, cleverness and readiness, if I went on like that I probably would have liked to be an English major. I also believe that since I wouldn't have had superb grades, I probably wouldn't have made it into a medical school anyway.

Well, something went wrong, and I wanted to become a physician. I didn't have the qualities to become a doctor; I had to change myself. From a slow, quiet child, I changed myself into a fast teenager who did not care to pay whatever the cost for the objective.

My senior year was pretty hard. Since I still had AP's to complete, while other kids were going to prom and movies and playing around, I was sitting at home solvng problems. Friends left and summer vacation wasn't a vacation since I was going to summer school to knock requisites out of the way. To think about it, this is the first summer when I can do anything I want to do - which, at the moment, is to be lazy. This is probably the last time as well; I still have license exams and OSCE's coming up.

At times like that, I feel irritated when people casually say they want to become physicians. I paid so much more to get where I am (which is a baby medic). While others were having fun I was sitting at my desk solving equations. I won't be able to understand if the people who were having fun and I got to the same place.

Thankfully, I still believe God is here, since those who had fun ended up in nasty holes. Some ended up taking multi-grand loans, or going to schools that no one had ever heard of.

the bigger the thing is that you want, harder to get it by suddenly thinking about it. Those who went to med school from my year were pretty set on becoming doctors Freshman year. That was why we could start prepping early.

On the tangent, it's a long way to a medical practice. When I calculated I still have 17 years to go before I get to the place I want to be. 17 years is how long I've lived in this world; since I began schooling at the age of 5, I'm not even halfway there.

Mr. Grinch = Mr. Bush?

I had an awful dream last night. It wasn't as wacko as the Reno dream, but it was still just as strange.

I was coming home from college. I got off the plane, walked casually to the gate, where I got stopped by a customs guard.

"Why are you here?" he asked.

"Erm... I'm home for Christmas?"

"You are under arrest. You have the right to keep your silence."

"Wait, WHAT?"

Turns out that President Bush suddenly came up with this bizarre idea that he wants Christmas all for himself (No, I wasn't reading How Grinch Stole the Christmas...). So, he asked the Congress to pass a law stating that it was now illegal in the United States to celebrate Christmas unless you had a specific permission signed by Bush. Since I was coming home to celebrate Christmas, now a crime punishable under law, I was under arrest.

I started to cry.

Then I woke up.

Getting into med school - How?

For those of you who read this blog (is there such person?), there are probably those who want to get into medical school. for the masochists like you, I will tell you how to get into medical school. Yey!

Yes... there are two types of those who want to get into med school. One is a masochist, who just isn't getting enough pain in universities and wants more. The other is a sadist, who wants to inflict pain on others, also known as the patients.

Anyway...

I think the most defined location to enter med school is Japan. If you get the score above the cut-off, you're in. How do you clear the requirement? Study, of course. How you study is up to you. There are those who memorise after just reading; there are some others who need to write to remember things. Then there's some who need to read, write, and solve to remember (and that would be me). No one can teach you this. To figure out how to study is also part of studying.

The United States? This is a little more vague. First, you have to do your senior year of university in the US. Superb scores on MCATs is usually a must. You have to do an interview. If you're a foreigner, TOEFLs are also required. Essays are usually part of the admissions process... there is no certain factor that'll get you in, so if the judge likes you you're admitted and if he doesn't like you, well, too bad.

Great Britain... well, you have to have a certain level of English. First you apply through UCAS, and then you take an exam. When you get a score above a certain level on those tests (and you may ask, what is the cut off? The answer is... I have no clue. My university didn't release that information), then you have an interview. The interview will examine how much you want to become a physician and how suited you are to the career. There is no right answer; so, I suggest you carefully think about why exactly you want to become a physician and if you're really suitable to the pressured career personality-wise (hint: if you're slow worker, this job may not be for you. Physicians are required on-time, split-second decisions.). Then you get an offer, usually a conditional, stating "if you get so-and-so scores on such-and-such tests, we'll accept you". Clear the requirements and you're in (for your information, I was officially admitted early July. That means if I didn't clear my conditions I'd be a useless unemployed oxygen-to-carbon dioxide converter for a year).

Well, anywhere you go, it's a tough road. Competition is fierce. All-nighters and lack of sleep will follow you around. As Christina from 'Grey's Anatomy' had said, "Aren't doctors workaholics with god-complex?" I see my seniors and she's damn right.

If you still want to become a physician after reading all this... good luck.